More Ice Please

I'm 40 years old and grew up in a lower middle-class town. My parents worked hard so me and my brothers never had any worries in life. They didn't have multiple jobs and we didn't endure any financial hardships, but we learned at a young at what it was like to live with hard-working parents who were gone all day or night to give us a good life. When we went out to eat I was told that no matter what, if you order it you eat it, and you finish it. When somebody bought you something you appreciated it and you took care of it. Clothes were supposed to last and you were supposed to do your part to make them last. I grew up around like-minded families and friends who valued relationships over status and possessions. So many of our stories revolve around playing some sort of gaming or causing mischief together, yet nobody could come between us in those days. My parents were just as likely to yell at and discipline me as they were my friends, and the same went for when I was at somebody else's house. It truly was the village raising us Gen X'ers.

Without writing an endless blog on my youth, the value of hard work and commitment was instilled in me from a very young age. The local little league I played in kept the same teams together year after year. My soccer and basketball teams consisted of almost the exact same teammates every year from kindergarten to high school. We were always pretty good, especially in soccer, but there were always those rival teams that were tough to beat or just a little bit better depending on the year. Regardless, the last thing I could imagine as a young kid would be jumping to a different team.

Flash forward to 2017 and people like me are a dying breed. Unless it is an organized school sport, kids rarely have the same teammates multiple years in sports. Going out to eat is the norm, and keeping good care of material possessions is becoming more devalued in our materialistic society by the day. Kids are growing less accountable for the actions and performance. I see this in both the classroom and on the sports world. If kids are under-performing in the classroom it is because the teacher is not engaging enough or teaching in a way that meets the individual students needs. On the sports field, often times if a player is under-performing it is because the coach has done something to destroy their confidence or make them uncomfortable. In 1987, kids were told to pay attention and work harder in the classroom, or to step up and take advantage of your opportunities on the sports field. In 2017, kids aren't told anything, the parents do the talking for them and direct everything away from their kids. Is this because we Gen X'ers had it so tough as kids?

That's a whole different topic, but the village and parents no longer want other opinions from other adults about their child, and it has completely changed the world of youth sports. When things get difficult or kids today are met with a challenge, most parents try to find the easiest way for their kids to escape. It is no longer safe or OK for kids to fail. Our kids today must be praised, and if they are not successful, then we as parents seek out the easiest way for them to find success and happiness. When it comes to youth travel baseball, this philosophy has drastically altered the playing field for both kids and parents.

Six years ago my oldest son was starting to really develop his love of baseball and enjoying some success on the field. Having the 1980's mindset, all I wanted was for him to make his little league all-star team. We knew he was pretty good, but my wife and I were also grounded with his ability level. After tryouts, he was chosen to be on the second-tier team and we could not have been happier for his accomplishments. A few weeks later a friend of mind asked if I had thought about taking him to a full time travel team tryout. Are you kidding me? There's no way he's good enough and we thought he was too young for that anyways. After all, he was just 9 years old. So we finished out the rest of the all-star season so proud of our son for being a standout player on that team, and marveling at the abilities of some of the kids on that top park team.

The following year at the ball park was much different. My son had continued to work hard and now had clearly passed some of the kids in ability and performance. Meanwhile, I rarely saw my one friend in the summer because he was always out of town for a tournament or at a practice. I kept thinking he was crazy for doing that. My wife and I were really excited for the upcoming all-star tryouts because we felt our son would be a lock. Heck, a couple of his teammates were on the top team last year and he was clearly better than them. So tryouts come and our son doesn't make the top team. We were stunned and irate. This was our first lesson in ballpark politics. While we didn't want to do it, we knew it was time to take the plunge into travel baseball.

A month or so later we decided to have him tryout for what was, at the time, the best and most established area travel baseball program. There were no less that 30 kids who paid to come to tryout. When we called with an offer to join a team we were ecstatic. We felt like his hard work had finally paid off. We weren't doing this for exposure, we just wanted him to play for a team and an organization where parents didn't get to pick the teams or the positions. Eventually we did the same thing our other son too.

The first couple years of travel ball were a fun time. You didn't have to go too far to find good competition that was going to make your kids better. Granted, playing the same teams almost every weekend got a little old, but the quality of the games was fun to watch. It seemed like every game was competitive. It was also nice to see our son struggle a bit and have to make the adjustment to this higher level of competition. Yet as each year began going by I started to notice a change, and it wasn't for the better.

Each summer the local tournaments started having more and more teams, and most of these teams were names that I did not recognize. At first that seemed somewhat exciting, but what started happening is that everybody started joining the travel baseball scene, regardless of the talent level. Kids that hadn't been little league all-stars before were now all-stars by default. That must mean that they're good enough to go and compete at a higher level right? Teams that were decent suddenly split up because parents couldn't get along. Players that weren't happy playing the outfield and batting seventh were now finding it very easy to go to a new team where they could play the infield and bat higher in the order. It didn't matter the quality of the team, it was about the individual.

The common word used for a lot of travel baseball coaches and parents is trophy chaser. Well in my opinion, this is the exact opposite of what is going on. Instead of chasing the trophy, parents are chasing the easy path for playing time for their kids. Instead of playing in a local tournament with six really good teams, now you're in a local tournament with 12 teams. Instead of having six really good teams, there might be 2-3 really good teams. However, you still have to find arms to cover all of those extra games and innings. Quite honestly, most teams do not have the pitching depth to adequately do that, so they run out the same 3-5 kids for multiple games to try and get that trophy. The better teams find no desire to play 2-3 games that will not be overly competitive. What is the point in driving 45 minutes to play 4 innings and win by 8-10 runs?

But hey, I'm not going to try and tell people what they should or shouldn't do with kids at the youth levels. If you have the time and energy to coach a youth team, go right ahead and sign them up for whatever tournaments you want. If you want your kid to get an opportunity to play a position he can't on his current team, then it is your choice to take him somewhere else and develop him at the position that he wants to play. After all, this game is supposed to be fun, for both the parents and the kids, so I don't fault anyone for seeking out that opportunity for their kid. If you can find 9 other players and families that are willing to accommodate your wishes for playing time, then get your kid better at the position that he wants to play. However, it does force the better kids and teams to seek more opportunities outside of our area to find better competition. At the same time, what message does it send to the kid?

That is where my concern really comes in with youth travel baseball. It is way too easy for kids to run from competition or for parents to seek out what they think is a better opportunity for their kids to play the position they feel like the deserve. Parents don't necessarily care about the quality of the team or the coaching, they just want to know their kid is going to be on the team and play the position that they want, not the position that they have earned. There are becoming increasingly too many options that keep kids from having to work hard to get what they want. So what is the problem with this? After all, if I'm not raising my kids this way then why should I care or even have an opinion? Well, let me tell you.

My kids love baseball. It is hands down their favorite sport. My kids will be attending a high school with over 3,000 kids that has won a state title, lost in the semi-state, and finished runner up in the last 3 years. At this high school, positions are earned not negotiated. More importantly, you have to be able to play to be able to make the team at this high school. I will openly admit that I don't know if either of my sons will ever play varsity baseball. At the same time, I know my kids have the passion and desire to play in high school and beyond, and it's the beyond part I want to talk about.

Our area has so many local options for youth baseball, that it is very difficult to say which organization is the best. While that can be a good thing at the youth levels, it absolutely kills our local kids at the high school level. College and professional scouts rarely venture into the 50 degree weather to watch baseball in the spring in northern Indiana. However, our area has seen a number of kids sign Division I LOI's and professional contracts in the last couple of years. This proves that our area has the talent that could lure scouts to watch some of those mid-May games, but they rarely come because they know the kids will pay big money come to them.

You see, in our area there is this persistent myth that in order to get exposure to college coaches you need to go play for one of the top organizations in Indianapolis or Chicago. I guess I shouldn't say myth, because in reality it is true. But why does it have to be that way? Our area is consistently showing that it has high level talent, but why do they feel forced to go play for a team two hours away? The answer is pretty simple. We do not have a team/organization in our area that puts all of the top kids in our area together. We have too many parents that have put their kids on teams in the last few years that would give them the best opportunity to hit in the middle of the order and play their desired position. Our local youth parents have gotten too used to expecting to go to Indianapolis or Chicago and come home with a losing record. Why? Simply put, we never take a team to those events that features the top talent from our area.

Could you imagine if at age 12 or 13 the South Bend area had one top organization that took the top 12-13 players in our area and featured them in big regional events? What if the next best 12 kids were put on a team and sent to smaller regional events where they too could find some success and compete? Suddenly college coaches and scouts would see and recognize that if a kid from the South Bend area plays for this organization that this is a kid who they need to keep an eye on. Instead, programs like the Indiana Bulls make money hand over fist because people bring kids to them from all over the state. People think that if I can get my kid to play for that organization then their baseball future is somewhat secured, as long as they keep working hard. In my opinion, there is no reason why the South Bend area can't put together a team/organization that could have a similar reputation.

So let me bring this back to my kids for a second. Do I think that either of my kids are one of the best 12-13 kids in their age group in our region? Honestly, I don't think so; however, I'll never really get to find out. Instead of finding this out early in their careers and having something to work and strive for, in theory, I could keep bouncing my kids around between local options that would give my kids the best opportunity to feature their individual skills. Too many parents think that scouts are more impressed by a kid that kids fourth for an average team that a kid who hits eighth for an elite team, and they couldn't be more wrong. If my kids are good enough to make an elite team, then I'd have them tryout for the next level team. The same thought process we had when we entered the travel baseball world six years ago.

If I'm so smart and passionate about this then why don't I make it happen? Simply put, because it never will happen in our area. There are too many opinions and egos to ever allow for something like this to happen in the South Bend area in a time-frame where my kids could benefit. I don't have the baseball knowledge or pedigree to make it happen. Because we have too many teams and opportunities for kids to avoid having to tryout and experience being told their not good enough to make a team or play their desired position, this fantasy land might last for a year or two before somebody else would decide to create a local rival. Rivalries and competition are good, but not when the talent is limited. Markets like St. Louis, Chicago, and Indianapolis can have elite level baseball clubS, but South Bend can only have one. However, the watered down effect in our area will never allow for this. High school baseball coaches in the area need to bond together to promote this for the benefit of their kids, but that is unlikely as well.

So instead, parents in our area will continue to dump thousands of dollars into the youth travel baseball industry. The monster has become too big to put back into it's cage. Every year parents are left to try and figure out which organization is the best for their son. Do I go with the team that has the better record or the team that will allow my son to play where I want him to play? Do I play for the coach who has more baseball knowledge or the coach who will hit my kid fifth? Do I play for the team that will win more tournaments or the team that will do more traveling to play against better competition? Would I rather go a and watch three bad baseball games every weekend so we can make a championship game, or would I rather watch my son play in five highly competitive games and come home with a losing record?Is it better for my son to play with his friends and high school teammates or for a more competitive program? These decisions are thrown at us in a constant barrage that keep our cell phones aglow for hours.

At the youth levels I don't have the answer, except to listen to your kid and do what they want. After all, youth sports are about and for the kids. Go chase your trophies or focus on development, which ever you decide you should not be judged. However, as they get older all of this watering down has caused an over-saturation of the sport that will never bring scouts to our area.

At the same time, the boom of travel baseball has created more feature events than ever for gets to get noticed. College coaches and scouts know where they can go to get the biggest bang for their buck. Most of those coaches grew up with a similar mindset that I did. They don't like getting up to change the channel and they like things that are simple. They want kids who have worked hard to earn spots on teams. They don't like being flooded with choices, so they want to know the short list of top organizations from each area. Unfortunately, kids in the South Bend area will not have that advantage because of our current youth structure, and most parents in the area are too short-sighted to see this.

While I like to have my drinks with ice, there is only so much I can tolerate before my Coke tastes like diet or my whiskey tastes like wine. As we continue to water down youth travel baseball, please don't be offended if I hold my hand over my glass. I like my drinks stronger than most, and I hope my kids have been raised to be strong enough to understand that not everyone is good enough to make the team. I know they'll have to deal with that at some point, but not with travel baseball in our area.